Wake Me Up When November Ends

I seriously want to just sleep the remaining days of November away.

I’m supposed to love November, I used to love November – my birth month, and is usually my lucky month, but definitely not this year.

It all started well - "well" is actually an understatement, let me say it started with a bang! I was in a meaningful retreat, celebrated my birthday with co-workers and the whole of the university, another birthday celebration with my friends... There wasn't a minute I wasn't thanking God for the most wonderful life some people could only dream. Until...

- I lost one of my phones (Nokia; I forgot the unit model). I always bring two phones, my Globe and my Sun. The Sun phone isn't technically mine, the postpaid line is an extension of my then-boyfriend's plan, and the phone unit is his too. I'm not really sure how I lost it, it wasn't stolen that I'm sure, it might have slipped from my bag or something.

- We were told that our salary will be delayed. Imagine working since start of November, without salary UNTIL NOW. This isn't really complain-worthy because I'm totally ok with it, I still have some savings... but still.

- With my ATM empty, I even lost the cash I have in my wallet. This one's been happening to me for several months already everytime I go to this certain place. I seriously broke down when I knew it because it was alloted for my allowance until I get my salary. Seriously, how can people be that heartless and insensitive?

- My Globe phone (Samsung Ultra Tocco S8300; touch screen, slide with keypad, 8MP camera) started acting up. I've been using it for more than a year without any problems until it acted up. I didn't see it coming as it was in a mint condition, but without any sign or symptom, it started restarting all by itself. The screen started blacking out for some reasons, and then...

- I lost that Samsung phone. Losing the Sun phone wasn't a really big deal because it was just a spare, it's actually been disconnected for several weeks already but my Globe phone was my jewel. It contains ALL my contacts and other important things. It's the most amazing phone one could ever have, besides that, it was a graduation gift from my mother. It's my most loved phone because it takes digital-camera-quality pictures, the MP3 player was very user friendly, and the fact that it's touch screen with a keypad just suits my mood. I was totally devastated. Again, I wasn't sure how it was lost. I placed it in the pocket of my back pack on my way to the bus station going to Batangas, and then poof! It's gone as I checked it on my seat.

- I finally have cut my ties with a past. This one was my personal decision. I wouldn't lie that since we broke up last year, we've still been trying to patch things up and get back together. He tried, I can see that, and I did my best, too, but it wasn't working. I had doubts with myself, I had huge doubts with my feelings and the only thing I was sure of was that I want to stop hurting him. Guilt was probably one of the many reasons. I should stop lying to him. I have to stop making him believe that we're good when in fact, I've been wanting to get away. I know I'm selfish. I have to be this time.

I know I'm not supposed to weep like I'm the biggest loser in this earth but fter all of these and more have happened, I just want to cuddle up in bed and sleep and wait for this month to end, or shall I say I want all the disappointments to end. I want all the hurts to go away. I want all the bad vibes to be gone.

On a positive note, as much as I want all of these unfortunate events to just leave me alone, I still want to thank the Lord for helping me get through and giving me the best support system there is - my sisters.